So, How are you feeding your mind today?

So, How are you feeding your mind today?

I hope you will agree with me on these following statements:

– 15-20 mins of watching a comedy show will uplift your mood, irrespective of your mood at the beginning.

– 15-20 mins of listening to sad songs or watching a sad movie will make you feel blue, again, irrespective of your mood at the beginning.

-15-20 mins of reading a news about a terror attack, a bomb blast, any major accident will make you feel terrified, vulnerable, insecure, angry.

-15-20 mins of watching romance will urge you to be with your partner of opposite sex or to fantasize about one if you don’t have a real one.

-15-20 mins of reading a motivational book/article will make you feel charged up.

Agreed! Then, here is why this is so. Information we receive from various sources are the food for our mind. Our mind process the information and generates thoughts according to the stuff provided. Positive information will lead to positive thoughts and negative one will result in negative thoughts. The thoughts generated will then lead to our feelings and behaviors. In this way, information leads to our day to day behaviors. Sometimes, this influence of the information received is quick and spontaneous, the other times it is slow. It all happens in the background, behind the curtain, that you can not see all this happening. So, Information has the power to play with our minds, and now-a-days, it is available at the tip of our fingers. We are actually living in an over-informed age. You are surrounded by the informations through out the day, starting from the time you wake up till you switch off the night lamps. Courtesy: Newspaper, radio, t.v, various people near you, and the most important one: your mobile phone. Many people have this habit of starting there day with reading newspaper. If you are starting the day with the informations like accidents, rape, murders, suicide, corruption, mismanagement in the town, etc, think what food you are giving to your brain to start the day with. Many people pick there mobile phones as soon as they wake up and also check it just before they go to bed. Again, I am very sure the information you are accessing is not necessarily a positive one. Yes, there are motivational stuff and good humour circulated through platforms like whatsapp and youtube, but you usually receive a lot of information through this medium which may or may not be good. Here the quality of information may be on a positive side, but the quantity, the volume is huge. It, therefore, becomes a un-neccessary burden for your mind, which may result in feeling lethargic, if not bad. The same is the case with t.v. It is good to have some entertainment, but check out the quality of shows you are watching. For example, people love watching news. It is good to know what is happening in the world around. But, if there is an accident happened in which many people have died. You saw it, you feel bad, you sympathized, all o.k. What sense does it make to watch it repeatedly, to visit various news channels, to hear what the survivors are saying, to hear the news again and again? Similarly, what does the shows based on crimes give you? Do they give any positive input to your brain? Illicit relationships, mistrust, sexual abuses, fraud, greed, and many more negativity is all they serve, with a gift wrap of ‘alarming people’!

Information, by itself, is neutral. It is the state of mind of the person who receives it which decides how to process it and what to extract. As we are living in an over-informed age, chances are high that we may process one or the other information in an unhealthy, negative manner. You will agree that we all have those ‘weak moments’ in our lives, when we are not psychologically strong. Due to today’s highly stressed occupations and lifestyles, such incidences of ‘feeling weak’ have became more frequent. People often have such moments on a regular basis, even daily! In such cases, it is crucial to filter the information before it reaches our mind, or else the consequences may be real bad. For instance, A person who is going through a tough phase of life, reads about people committing suicide in similar circumstances. What do you think, how is he going to process this information? Yes, he may think “This is the only way…” A person, highly in debt, watches a crime based show in which few people looted a house of a lonely lady. What message he may get from there? “This is possible”.

So, next time you are about to hook yourself with any source of information, be alert. Don’t waste your time and energy on any un-neccessary or/and negative piece of information. Only focus on the important and necessary informations. Keep yourself updated about the happenings of the world, but choose a right channel and a right time to access such informations.

Give a good feed to your mind and experience the difference in yourself. If you are feeling irritated, puzzled, lethargic, gloomy; check what informations are you feeding to your mind in last few day. You will find the answers by yourself!

Happy mind-feeding!

Tapan K. Pandit

Career Planning: Need of the hour!

Career Planning: Need of the hour!

Career selection has became confusing like never before. Two factors are responsible for this confusion:

1- Availability of wide range of courses (some very new and informal) and colleges/universities in India and abroad.

2-Poor employability ratio in highly popular courses like Engineering and MBA (as reported by ASSOCHAM and Quartz).

This calls for a change in the method of career selection. Earlier, students have fewer choices (or we can say they are not aware about choice available) like if someone studying in 12th standard with PCM as subjects will go either for engineering or bachelor of science. Someone with PCB as subjects will opt for Medical or bachelor of science. Commerce student will either go for CA/CS or bachelor of commerce etc. Selection of course and college was usually based on the information they get from people in their contact like any family member or relatives and some simply opt for what their friends are opting for. They go for courses which are highly popular. This way of career selection led many to a dis-satisfactory and non-fruitful career as they either entered into a wrong institution which provided them sub-standard education with poor skill based teaching or they simply landed into a wrong career path for which their aptitude and skills were not compatible. Outcome: Career/Job dissatisfaction.

It is a high time to change this old style of career selection! One has to be very cautious and alert. With this changing world, job market has also changed. New job sectors have emerged which have high demand for skilled personal, like e-commerce, data analytics, mobile apps development, gaming, digital marketing, etc. Journalism, Mass comm, Marketing & Sales, Logistics, Health, Retail, Social service, Defense, Agriculture and dairy technology are the sectors having good demand. Education has emerged as a promising career option (gone were the days when teacher was synonymous to low earner) Research and development is calling intellectuals like never before. Banking, Railways and Government jobs including civil and judicial services as well as PSUs are having good demands too, although excessive competition make it a hard nut to crack.

So, we can’t say that there is scarcity of jobs. Demand is there and what recruiters states is surprising as they say “Our demands often left unmet!” They are not getting skilled or properly educated/trained manpower! Only getting a degree is not enough in todays world, you have to be skilled.

Keeping all this in mind, think twice before finalizing any course or college, as once you enter, it will be really difficult to take a U-turn!

Here are some steps you may like to follow:

1: Write down things you really like to do (Don’t think career here, simply write what you like to do. It can be anything like gaming, sketching, reading, etc)

2: From this list, delete those interests about which you are not very much inclined or serious

3: Now, from remaining list, check if you build a career around any of your interests. Remember, it may be direct (someone loves cooking can become chef or someone who likes gaming can become a game developer) or indirect ( like someone good in socializing can go for marketing and sales and someone who likes cars and bikes can go for automobile engineering or designing)

4: If you have more than 01 choice, give them a rating like 1 for most interested than 2 for comparatively less interested.

5: Go for internship, even of 7-8 days for the profession you are interested in. You will get someone in your family or relatives who can help you with this. Believe me, it will give you a real taste of what your career will be like.

6: After observing closely for few days, if you still feel that yes! This is the career I want to pursue, than start finding good colleges offering your selected course. Inquire about admission process, fees structure, placements etc

7: Write a action plan with every details: which coaching for entrance exam (If any), what skills are required, when will application procedure start etc.

8: Shoot! Start chasing your dream career.

For those who are not happy with the above mentioned steps,i.e., they are really not having any idea about what they like or if someone is very confused ( there are many!), consulting a counselor is advisable. Counselor can help you with their career interest inventories, aptitude testing, psychological assessment and would let you know which career are you best fit for. Personality-Career mapping is really helpful to many in such cases.

When one should start this career selection process? The earlier, the better! Ideally, one should start thinking from 9th standard, latest by 10th as stream/subject selection stage, which will be the foundation of your career, will be coming after 10th. Those who has crossed this junction, can go for career planning when they are in 11th standard.

All the best!

Tapan K.Pandit



Center for counseling and personalized training

Happy Careers Happy Lives!

माता-पिता है आईना, और बच्चे उनका अक्स

(एक साधारण सी बात, विशेष तौर पर युवा पता-पिता के लिए..)

(A food for thought, specially for young parents..)

हम माता पिता को अक्सर शिकायत करते सुनते है कि हमारा बच्चा बहुत टीवी देखता है या वो दिनभर मोबाइल पर गेम खेलता रहता है. प्रश्न ये है कि किसने बताया उसे टीवी क्या होती है और मोबाइल क्या है? जबसे उसका जन्म हुआ तब से उसने आपको और परिवार के बाकि सदस्यों को टीवी देखते देखा. याद कीजिये क्या कोई दिन ऐसा गया जब आपने टीवी नहीं देखी हो? जब वो थोड़ा बड़ा हुआ, आपने ही उसे कार्टून दिखाया. आप टीवी देखते है नियम से रोज, यही अब वो भी करना चाहता है, तो अब आप कैसे रोकेंगे? आप खुद टीवी नहीं छोड़ सकते, तो उससे ऐसा करने को कैसे कहेंगे, और वो क्यों मानेगा? ऐसे ही मोबाइल का उदहारण है, जब से उसने आँख खोली है, सभी को वो मोबाइल मैं कुछ न कुछ करते देख रहा है. कोई फोटो ले रहा है, तो कोई चैट कर रहा है. ये दृश्य भी आम है कि माता या पिता अपने साल भर या उसे भी छोटे बच्चे को स्ट्रोलर मे ले कर घूमने निकले है और मोबाइल पर बात कर रहें है, बच्चा अपनी गाडी मे बैठा चुप चाप. वो चाहता है आप उससे बात करे, पर आप मोबाइल मे लीन है. जब वो थोड़ा समझने लायक हुआ तो आपने ही उसे मोबाइल पकड़ा दिया कि वो मोबाइल मे व्यस्त रहे और आप अपना काम या आराम कर सके. यदि ऐसा है तो और बड़े होने पर जब वो मोबाइल मे गेम खेलेगा तो आप कैसे मना करेंगे?

बच्चों के लिए मातापिता एक आईने के समान होते है जिनमे वो अपना अक्स देखते है. जराfaulty parenting सोचिए यदि आईने में दाग हो तो क्या होगा? स्वावभिक है अक्स मैं भी दाग दिखेगा. उसी प्रकार यदि मातापिता मैं अवगुण है, तो उनका असर बच्चों पर भी आएगा. जब मातापिता सुलझे विचारों के हो, सुखी हो, संतुष्ट हो, तो बच्चों में भी सकारात्मकता आएगी. लेकिन यदि मातापिता ही चिड़चिड़े हो, क्रोध, लालच, अहंकार, घृणा से भरे हो, तो वे अपने बच्चों से ऐसी उम्मीद कैसे कर सकते है? यदि आप चाहते है की आपके बच्चे संस्कारी बने, तो पहले आपको सही संस्कार सीखने होंगे, अपनाने होंगे. याद रखे बच्चों के पास देखने समझने की अद्भूत क्षमता है. वो ज्यादातर व्यवहार अपने आसपास से देख कर सीखते है. हो सकता है आप का बच्चा थोड़ा चिड़चिड़ा हो, जिद्दी हो. आप सोचेंगे हम तो इससे हमेशा प्यार से बात करते है, डांटते भी नहीं. फिर ये ऐसा क्यों करता है? आप ये याद करे क्या आप हमेशा उसके सामने खुश रहते है? कहीं आप उसके सामने अपनी चिड़चिड़ाहट तो नहीं निकालते? कहीं आप पतिपत्नी आपस मैं तो झगड़ा नहीं करते? आप के घर का वातावरण कैसा है? आप के पास से नकारात्मक ऊर्जा तो नहीं निकलती? (नकारत्मक ऊर्जा हमारे मस्तिष्क मैं आने वाले नकारात्मक विचारो से उत्पन्न होती है ) और ऐसा बहुत कुछ हो सकता है! सोचिये ! बच्चे शब्दो से ज्यादा मन की भावनाओं को समझते है, आपके मस्तिष्क से निकलने वाली ऊर्जा को समझते है. आप को देख के, आप से ही वो सीखता है. जैसी आदतें आप में हैं, वैसी ही उसमे भी आएँगी. खुद अच्छी आदतों को अपनाएं, अच्छे संस्कारों को अपनाएं. साफ़ मन से, सकारात्मक विचारो के साथ बच्चे के साथ समय बिताएं. अपने मन दर्पण को चमकाए, देखिये कैसे आपका अक्स, आपका बच्चा भी झिलमिला उठेगा..


तपन पंडित

काउन्सलिंग  साइकोलोजिस्ट, गाइडपोस्ट

(सेण्टर  फॉर  काउन्सलिंग एंड  पर्सनलाइज्ड  ट्रेनिंग)

Why students should go for personality testing before choosing a career?


Career selection was and is a complicated process. Have you ever gone to shopping mall to buy a dress? Of course, you would have! How would you make this buy? Most probably, you must have first tried it on yourself in the changing room. If it looks good on you, then you go for it, otherwise not. Similar example can be taken of buying a new car or a bike. You would first visit a showroom and ask the executive for a trial. If you find the automobile good in performance and suiting to your physic as well, you would go for a buy, otherwise you will go to the next showroom to try another product of another company. We may recall another few examples also in which before going for a final shot, we ‘try’ things.

Unfortunately, we cannot do this with ‘Careers’. We cannot ask a university to ‘try out’ a course so that if you like it, you will go for it. If not, then you will move on to another university for trying out another course. Even if you wish this may happen in any world, you can’t afford to spend your time and money for this ‘Trial’, Isn’t it? This non-availability of ‘trial’ makes career selection a tough and nerve-hitting job.

What is the possible solution? Well, we cannot practically try a career or even a job (it is possible up to certain extent though); we can understand a career well. But, this all should start with understanding your own personality. Personality-Career mapping is one good practice to avoid falling into a wrong career.

Psychologists have defined personality as a critical combination of hereditary/genetical , environmental and cultural influences, but they have also agreed that a major part of your personality is pre-determined and basic tendencies of a person remains unchanged throughout the lives. Let’s take an example. If you are an introvert, you will remain introvert throughout your life. You may learn to be more sociable, you may become more talkative, even you may start going to various parties and enjoy them too for the sake of professional growth or acceptance among peers; but if someone ask you what would you really like to do? Your most probable answer will be, “I would like to go to the beach, lay down there and read a book”.

So, why not choose a career which really suits your personality? There are various personality assessment tests available which can give you a clear idea about your personality and the best suited career as well.These tests cost you not more than the price of a branded Shirt! There are some free resource also available but their reliability is doubtful. Seek professional guidance, ask counselor at your school/college or any psychologist for helping you out with this. It will surely help!

The best time to go for Career-Personality Mapping is when a student is on any career junction, like in 9th or 10th standard, the time to choose a stream (Maths/Bio?Humanities etc). Similarly, for 11th or 12th graders to choose what after 12th? Students studying in 2nd/3rd or final year of graduation should also go for it either if they just want to re-assure or planning to change fields.

You are going to invest a huge amount of money of your parents as well as your valuable time and efforts in shaping your career which may go waste if you enter into a wrong  field. So, why not take some proactive measures to be doubly sure!!

Happy Careers!!

Tapan K. Pandit

Counseling Psychologist

Guidepost- Center for counseling & personalized coaching

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